A drunk walks out of a bar late at night and see's a nun walking past on the footpath. He utters something hateful to himself as he begins running building momentum before launching himself at the nun catching her with a massive superman punch to the back of the head knocking her tumbling brutally to the pavement. He proceeded with a swift kicking to the nuns ribs and spine before grabbing the nun by the scruff of her habbit and lifting her limp to her feet til face to face. Looking the nun dead in her eyes with menace the drunk victoriously growled. Your not so bloody tough tonight are ya Batman.
People say rape is bad, it is because I don't want STD and HIV
Did you hear about the two burglars that stole a calendar? I hear they got six months each.
A woman ran into a police station screeming "help i have bin graped" the policeman said "do you mean raped" the woman said "no the was a bunch of then".
Alven and the chimpmunks commit war crimes
A man in Saudi Arabia was caught stealing hand sanitiser. The silver lining for him is that he will not need hand sanitiser anymore
my gun is like my house used to be full now its empty
The kid with a gun walked into my class room and fucking shot the teacher. He pointed the gun at me and asked,
"What's 2+2?" I answer him and he writes the answer down on his test. He did this with every kid. He got a 100%, expelled, and a lifetime in prison. Hey at least he gets free food.
There is a dark alley Who Do You Call? Batman.
What’s the difference between a police man and a bullet? At least when a bullet kills someone it’s actually fired
Shoplifter tried to rob a grocery store. He was asked to give an EGGsplanation.
Last time I got caught stealing a calendar I got 12 months.
why cant orphan be robbers cause they're not wanted
ya make 10 paintings, you arent an artist ya make 20 meals, you arent a chef but when i kill ONE PERSON, im a "horrible person" and a "menace to society"
What does an armed bank robbery and Michael Jackson have in common?
Someone gets hurt
A rapist, pedifile, and a priest walk into a bar He orders a beer
A panda walks into a restaurant orders some food and eats it. Once he was done he shoots the waiter then leaves. Police and detectives arrive at the scene, they ask the waiter "who did this to you? what happened?" The waiter replies "A panda, eats shoots and leaves"
if being sexy were a crime you better lock me up. not because I'm sexy but because I have 5 dead children in my basement
I had sex with twins, well I think it was twins all my rage victims look alike
Orphan- I want to be like batman Orphan worker- You are already like him hunny
