Conflict jokes
Why are Germans so good at cleaning?
They have experience in ethnic cleansing.
What is war used for? (put in comments below)
Women be like men cause wars, [but] forget men fight those wars while they fake cry.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Ukraine will go puff.
What makes a nuke and divorce the same?
It only takes one of each to end your life.
Someone was bullying Stephen, so I said, "Why do you not stand up for yourself?"
During the Great War, a man holding a machine gun shoots down a swarm of soldiers running on a swamp.
He says: "You came to the wrong swamp, Americans! You came to the wrong swamp!" *He didn't stop firing.*
What do you call a Taliban in a bath bomb?
Africa has every type of gun but one...
A water gun.
Why don’t midgets fight? They walk away to be the bigger man.
Family feud after finding out about Alabama.
I'd rate the food in Afghanistan a 9/11. That shit was bomb.
Why are we still fighting in darkness?
"Mission failed, soldier, we will get 'em next time."
So, I saw two homeless people on the road fighting. I said, "Stop fighting and go home." I guess it was a little insensitive.
I was in an argument with a "friend" at school. He said, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."
...so I threw a dictionary at him.
When you're fighting with the emo kid and he brings his friends. Now you gotta fight the suicide squad.
My ex keeps missing me. But her aim is steadily improving...
The emo kid ran away after his parents asked why they took the barcode sticker off the Oreos.
My brother called me short and ugly, so I called him an ambulance.
Do you know what's the difference between a knife and a girl's argument?
A knife has a point.