Conflict jokes

Why did Russia put war on Ukraine for more nuts?

I called a suicide hotline in Iraq... They got excited and asked if I could drive a truck.

America: "WE NEED MORE AMMO!"

Japan: "We are the ammo."

What did the soldier say when he saw a terrorist in a wheelchair?

"An RC-XD!"

Anyone know about the war? It's not Russia we should hate, it's Putin that we should. 🙄🤪💅

I've been trying to use Google Maps in Ukraine, but I couldn't because I only saw Russia.

Babies are like airstrikes; they get aborted.

If WW3 starts, I do, in fact, belong in the kitchen.

Violence isn't the answer. It's the question, and the answer is yes.

In America, you fight Ukraine.

In Soviet Russia, you fight Mykraine.

In Ukraine, there was a massive wake-up call by Russia. But for some, the results were the opposite.

"Rape[is] the only sign of world peace in this life."

Russia and Ukraine are running a marathon. Who do you think won? Russia did. Russia gave Ukraine a migraine.

I have gathered intelligence regarding the Russian Forces that have been stalled in Ukraine for days. Apparently, they are installing rear view mirrors on their combat vehicles and tanks in order to see the battle at the front lines.

Pickup lines in 2022 are like: "Are you Russia? Because your bombs are so big!"

How is the business in Ukraine? It's booming.

Why did the Carthaginian say Rome lost the war?

Because they were just roman around.

"History's repeating itself. WWIII is coming, and the second Russia nukes the U.S., they're all getting fucked."

Ukraine (🇺🇦) vs Russia (🇷🇺), place your bets!

Yo mama so stupid, she tried to stop the Cold War with a heater.