Comparison jokes
What is the difference between a hundred dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don't have a Ferrari in my garage!
Your mama's so fat that she can’t even talk, even if Kevin says, "Oh my gosh!" 'cause she has a big ass mouth.
Your mum is so ugly she could make an onion cry.
Yo mama so fat, Zeus used her as a bowling ball.
What's the difference between you and an egg?
An egg gets laid.
Your leg is straighter than James Charles.
What is the difference between a priest and anesthesia?
The anesthesia takes time to put you under.
I told a Chinese man, "Which is better, cats or dogs?"
He said, "Dogs."
I said, "Why?"
He said, "Because dogs tasted better than cats."
What’s the difference between a Mercedes and a Skoda?
Princess Di wouldn’t be seen dead in the back of a Skoda...
Your forehead's so big that I was tryna figure out if that was you or the moon.
Your hairline is like Quandel Dingle, it's so goofy!
Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke, and it asked me, "What is the difference between a large pizza and you?" One can feed a family.
What’s the difference between a WNBA player and a rotten apple? The apple has a chance to make it into the basket.
What do women and screen doors have in common? The more you bang them, the looser they get.
Your hairline is so messed up, I thought a 2-year-old cut you up!
What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period?
One is finger-licking good, and the other is just a fast-food restaurant.
Your hairline and your eyebrows are like your parents, separated.
What’s a zebra? A few sizes bigger than an A.
Why are emos jealous of light?
The lights are hanging.
Sometimes I feel ugly, then remember I have a brother, then I feel better.