Comparison jokes
What will fall faster, an emo or an apple?
An apple, because the emo would get caught on the rope.
What’s the difference between a Mercedes and a Skoda?
Princess Di wouldn’t be seen dead in the back of a Skoda...
What’s the difference between a WNBA player and a rotten apple? The apple has a chance to make it into the basket.
Your hairline is like Quandel Dingle, it's so goofy!
What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period?
One is finger-licking good, and the other is just a fast-food restaurant.
tru
What do women and screen doors have in common? The more you bang them, the looser they get.
I told a Chinese man, "Which is better, cats or dogs?"
He said, "Dogs."
I said, "Why?"
He said, "Because dogs tasted better than cats."
Your forehead's so big that I was tryna figure out if that was you or the moon.
Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke, and it asked me, "What is the difference between a large pizza and you?" One can feed a family.
What's the difference between onions and children? Nothing, when you cut one everyone around you cries.
What's the difference between babies and onions?
You don't cry cutting up babies.
Science teacher: How many times can the earth fit into the sun?
Me: As many times as the earth can fit into you.
Q: What does a slice of pizza and an F grade have in common?
A: They're both cheesy.
What's the difference between blood and an orphan? Blood has a place in all of our hearts.
Your forehead is so big it makes Megamind's head look small.
Dude, Mississippi got a better K/D ratio than you.
What hits the ground first, an apple or an emo girl?
The rope would catch her.
What's the difference between Putin and Hitler? I don’t know, you tell me.
Q: What are women better than men at doing?
A: Winning arguments.
Q: What are men better than women at doing?
A: Winning swimming titles.
Your forehead so big you got to take Tylenol pills, big like chocolate chip cookies.