Comparison jokes

Your hairline design was used as the Batman logo!

Your hairline is so long, people call it "The Natural Disaster!"

Obesity kills thousands of times more Americans than shooting does, which teaches us an important lesson:

Shooters do poorly given the size of their targets.

What is the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?

Usain Bolt can finish a race.

Your mum is so ugly she could make an onion cry.

Your mama's so fat that she can’t even talk, even if Kevin says, "Oh my gosh!" 'cause she has a big ass mouth.

Your leg is straighter than James Charles.

Your hairline is so curvy now, Ice Spice has competition!

What’s the difference between cereal and a baby?

I personally think cereal is not nutritious.

What is the difference between a hundred dead babies and a Ferrari?

I don't have a Ferrari in my garage!

Calling you an idiot would be an insult to stupid people. You're much worse than that.

Adolf Hitler + Vladimir Putin = Vladolf Putler.

What's the difference between depression and your ex?

Depression f**ks you harder.

The only difference between you and Jesus is that Jesus believed in himself.

What is the difference between a guy with cancer and the Twin Towers?

Nothing, they both fell.

What’s the similarity between my dick and my girlfriend?

I beat both of them.

Your hairline is so bad, it's not even McDonald's, it's Dixy Chicken!

What’s the difference between Geico and a wife?

Geico saves you more.

Ya forehead so big Sakura's forehead seemed small.

What do me and a casino machine have in common? It takes about 50 pumps to get to the jackpot.