Today I learned humans eat more bananas than monkeys. -- I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.
Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? Of course. The Empire State Building can't jump.
What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common? - Their balls are just for decoration.
What is the difference between butter and a blonde? - Butter is difficult to spread.
What do Colorado and Saudi Arabia have in common?
It's legal to get stoned.
