Comparison jokes
Sister: Wanna know the difference between your singing and your flute playing?
Me: Sure... (Expecting a completely different response than what I get.)
Sister: Nvm, they have no difference.
Me: *Confused*
Sister: They're both horrible.
The only difference between my grandma and the twin towers is that they collapsed faster than my grandma.
The Twin Towers collapsed faster than my grandma did.
Yo forehead so big it makes Megamind's forehead small.
Your forehead is so big that your name is Humpty Dumpty, the big forehead!
You're as tall as a giraffe.
Well, that's why you look like a baked bean!
Roses are red, violets are blue, but at least a dumptruck isn't as ugly as you.
Roses are red, violets are blue.
Shrek is ugly, but not uglier than you.
When we talk of our X, some people talk of their XXX. 🤣
Girl, you and slow are slower than a fairness.
Your hairline is so messed up, I thought a 2-year-old cut you up!
Call me fat? You call me fat because you think that you’re pretty, but you ain’t. You’re just a musty, dusty, rusty Cardi B.
Roses are red, violets are blue, people think that you’re fat, until they saw your mom.
What do vacuums and your mom have in common?
They both suck.
Erin like TJ, but his tapeline said no.
My child: "Dad, am I beautiful?"
Me: "You’re like the sun, sweetie. You’re painful to look at."
Your hairline be looking like the Great Recession.
Yo mama so fat when she walks the earth talks!
LMAO
Fortnite is just like high school. You get off the bus and start shooting everybody.
What's the difference between a speed bump and a road kill?
About 40 mph.