Common jokes

What does gum in my d*ck have in common?

Both get chewed on by little kids.

What do a pimp and a farmer have in common?

They both need a hoe to stay in business.

What do slinkies and the handicapped have in common?

They are the most fun when pushed down a flight of stairs.

What do an abortion and a baby have in common?

The mom doesn't want either of them.

Q: What do the St. Louis Rams and Billy Graham have in common?

A: They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell, “Jesus Christ.”

What do Communism, Socialism, Feminism, and Fascism all have in common?

They are all disabilities.

What do masturbation and brain damage have in common? After a few strokes, there’s no going back.

What does a burnt pizza, cold beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?

Someone didn’t pull it out in time.

What does a bridge and a fat chick have in common?

They’ll eventually get laid by a Mexican.

Q: What does a slice of pizza and an F grade have in common?

A: They're both cheesy.

What do me and a casino machine have in common? It takes about 50 pumps to get to the jackpot.

What do a 9V battery and a butthole have in common?

We know we’re not supposed to put our tongue on them, but we do it anyway.

What do bungee jumping and a gay man have in common?

If the rubber breaks, they're in beep shit.

What do black parents and elevators have in common?

Neither of them can raise anything without a belt.

What do shemales and barns have in common?

Cocks.

What do Will from "Stranger Things" and the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air have in common? They're both named Will, and their lives both got flipped, turned upside down.

What does a bar fly and a necrophiliac have in common?

They both enjoy a cold one once in a while.

What do noodles and women have in common? They both wiggle when you eat them.

What do James Doyle and Hannah Doyle have in common?

John fucked them both in the rear.

What do a Make-A-Wish kid and mosquitoes have in common?

They both got a 10% survival rate...