The twin towers was basically angry birds but in real life
Next time at walmart I'm going to scan my wrist they are basically barcodes
Saying I’m sorry and I apologise are basically the same thing... except at a funeral
If you're in Alabama family reunions are basically speed dating events.
Little girls are like basic math, if there under 13 you do them in your head
if an orphan takes a selfie... isn’t it basically a family portrait?
Sex is basically math. You add the bed. Subtract the clothes. Divide the legs to multiply inside.
jesus and satan are just basically homer and flanders. one tries to help the other, only for satan to just say "shut up".
Life lesson guys:
Remember, being healthy is basically dying as slowly as possible.
God died for your sins, so basically if you don't sin then Jesus died for nothing
What does the Bible stand for? Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth
I played Rock Paper Scissors with my friend enyaw . I cba with jokes basically me and enyaw always scissor
So as a school shooter, I try to remember my abc's. A, B, C, D, E, F, GUN! And I basically stop at G, since no students ever speaks to me about the rest.
Playing soccer in a wheelchair basically rocket league in real life
Hey guys, its Hailey here.
Ima start off with henlo ;-;
I know you guys aren't going to believe me because of the assholes who were faking to be me, but if you can try to believe me, I'll explain.
So, Jake. We can't really be together anymore, since we no longer can chat. I'm so sorry.
Basically, my parents caught us on here as you realized. Yayyyy.
I don't have time to say anything else. So I've gotta go, but thankyou guys for everything you did for me.
Also, You won't get any response from me so yea. So sorry guys ;-;
A man had moved to a new contry with his dog and with basic understanding of the language. One day he heard people talking about a place for dogs, so he took his dog there telling he wanted his dog to be groomed. The man behind the counter responded with "yes happy dog, come back in little hours" so the man left and came back a couple hours later when he asked about his dog he was given a box of jerky he found out "happy dog" was the name of the place where dogs become food.
if u text ur crush and they leave u on read, just know that read has four letters. yk what also has four letters? mine. so that basically means that you are theirs. :)
Did you know that..
Studies show 9 in 10 Americans do not have basic math skills.
Oh, thank god I'm in that 1%.
(Kizaru's back.)
If you mixed the iraq wheat scandal with the basics card paying other people's dole to your wife and tumble dried it in a royal commission that made your priestly mates look bad what would you get? Tony Abbott's career
A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin." "What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married 10 times?" "Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative. He kept telling me how great it was going to be. Husband #2 was in software services. He was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me. Husband #3 was from field services. He said everything checked out diagnostically, but he just couldn't get the system up. Husband #4 was in telemarketing. Even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver. Husband #5 was an engineer. He understood the basic process, but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method. Husband #6 was from finance and administration. He thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not. Husband #7 was in marketing. Although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it. Husband #8 was a psychologist. All he ever did was talk about it. Husband #9 was a gynecologist. All he did was look at it. Husband #10 was a stamp collector. All he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!" "Good," said the new husband, "but, why?" "You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm going to get screwed!"
