Sex is basically math. You add the bed. Subtract the clothes. Divide the legs to multiply inside.

(some kid crying because hes an orphan and kids are bulling him) teacher:HEY i was a orphan to so if you bully him your basicly trying to bully me too me:OOF teacher:now is somebody not here? me:your parents

jesus and satan are just basically homer and flanders. one tries to help the other, only for satan to just say "shut up".

So as a school shooter, I try to remember my abc's. A, B, C, D, E, F, GUN! And I basically stop at G, since no students ever speaks to me about the rest.

if u text ur crush and they leave u on read, just know that read has four letters. yk what also has four letters? mine. so that basically means that you are theirs. :)

If you mixed the iraq wheat scandal with the basics card paying other people's dole to your wife and tumble dried it in a royal commission that made your priestly mates look bad what would you get? Tony Abbott's career

Did you know that..

Studies show 9 in 10 Americans do not have basic math skills.

Oh, thank god I'm in that 1%.

(Kizaru's back.)

A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin." "What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married 10 times?" "Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative. He kept telling me how great it was going to be. Husband #2 was in software services. He was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me. Husband #3 was from field services. He said everything checked out diagnostically, but he just couldn't get the system up. Husband #4 was in telemarketing. Even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver. Husband #5 was an engineer. He understood the basic process, but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method. Husband #6 was from finance and administration. He thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not. Husband #7 was in marketing. Although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it. Husband #8 was a psychologist. All he ever did was talk about it. Husband #9 was a gynecologist. All he did was look at it. Husband #10 was a stamp collector. All he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!" "Good," said the new husband, "but, why?" "You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm going to get screwed!"