Common jokes

What does a pedophile and a light switch have in common?

They both get turned on by children.

What do magicians and prostitutes have in common?

Answer: disappearing acts.

What does a pregnant slave and a payless sale have in common?

Buy one, get one free.

What do an open champagne bottle and an orphan have in common? They both lost their pop.

What does a one-night stand have in common with earthquakes? You never know how long they'll last.

What do a small pair of underpants and a small dance room have in common?

No ballroom.

What does a Travis Scott concert and the Titanic cabin have in common? The music doesn’t stop when people start dying.

What does a bridge and a fat chick have in common They both get laid by Mexicans

What do apples and witches have in common? They both hang on trees.

What do fire and people have in common?

They will both eventually die out.

What does a woman and a hurricane have in common?

They’re nice and wet at first, but in the end they take everything.

What does Jeffrey Dahmer and Travis Scott have in common?

Eight dead people.

Parallel lines have so much in common, it’s a shame they’ll never meet.

What do pedophiles and Sandy Hook have in common?

Shooting up schoolchildren.

What do people that can only use half their face and wankers have in common?

They have both had a few strokes.

What does a blowjob and a bonus check have in common?

Someone’s always willing to blow your bonus.

What do strippers and butter have in common?

Both spread for bread.

What do alcoholics and amputees have in common?

They are both legless.

What do Viagra and Disneyland have in common?

They both cause you to stand around for an hour waiting for a two-minute ride.

What do gay men and drug dealers have in common?

They both get a lot of crack.