Come jokes
I can't come in, because I'm too high.
What's the difference between you and my dad? You come home.
Dad: Want to go to the park, kid?
Kid: Sure.
Dad: Come on.
Kid: Why are we at the orphanage?
Dad: Go in.
When you are sitting outside at school and this boy comes up to you with a rock in his hand and says, "Do you know where Mrs. Stewart is at?"
Dad: Boy, come sit in this hole while I brace the ground.
Boy: I don't want to see Grandpa, he scares me!
Why did the question come to life? Answer: The adding, subtracting, times, dividing by, and equals signs came to life and squished pages.
What’s the hardest part about being friends with a turtle?
Getting them to come out of their shell.
Wanted: Sperm donors. Please come quickly!
I think I am a boomerang because I always come back to you.
"Knock knock."
"Come in."
What's the difference between your dad and grocery shopping?
He didn't come back with the milk.
I call my penis the truth because the truth always comes out of children’s mouths.
One way to not pick up a girl is to say, “Are you an American school because I wanna shoot kids into you?” I tried it on a girl, and she is now terrified to come near me.
How was I supposed to know she was already pregnant?
Your dad is so f**king fat that when he bends over and comes back up, it's the next day.
What do nail polish and panties have in common?
Both come off with alcohol.
I saw my sisters masturbating with cucumbers and hotdogs.
I said, "Come on, I was gonna eat that later! Now it's just gonna taste like hotdogs and cucumbers!"
Wanna play dolls?
I can be Ken, and you can be the box I come in.
What comes after 69?
Period.
What does Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?
They both come while you’re asleep.
When I was a kid, my father would tell me that the black Santa Claus was coming to our house for Christmas. So, instead of putting out cookies and milk, we would put out cornbread and purple Kool-Aid.