Clothing jokes
Why does a golfer wear two pairs of pants?
In case he gets a hole in one!
How do you get 500 drunk TTC people out? "Ah, on fire, a warning shot." "Uhhh sir, it's a M92 mortar." "Ah, just fire the shot!" Please get out before you get triggered from the pool and you have no clothes showing your nono parts. Oh wait, please get out of the pool drunk people. Potato, potatoes, fire ze shot.
A man with 20 dollars walked into Dave & Buster's. He went to the bathroom to wash his hands. He walked out without any clothes but still has his money.
A young woman goes for her first gynecological exam, and the nurse has her take off her clothes, put on a gown, and get in the stirrups. She tells her the doctor will be in in a minute.
The doctor comes in and tells the young lady that she has one of the most beautiful vaginas he’s ever seen, and he has seen a lot of them. She thanks him for the compliment. He tells her he is about to start the examination, but he is going to have to numb her first, when she says ok, he goes:
"Num num num num num!"
What do cheetahs wear to work?
They can't change because cheetahs can't change their spots!
Memes
Why do jeans always compliment your booty?
Because they’ve got your back!
"What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?"
"Sofishticated."
What’s a ghost’s favorite type of pants?
BOO-TY JEANS!
What has 182 teeth and holds back a monster?
My zipper.
You're so bald, when you wear a turtleneck, you look like roll-on deodorant!
Yo mama's so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a whole species will become extinct.
Why did the priest go to the clothing sale at Walmart?
He heard that little boy's pants were half off.
Dude: Hey dude guess who I am?
Viewers: Dora.
Trump: No, I am President Trump.
Viewers: Why are you wearing Dora’s clothes and backpack?
Trump: Today we are going to build a wall.
Viewers: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Why does Batman only wear black?
Because he's emo!
What is an owl that wears armor?
What does a rain cloud wear under her dress?
Thunderwear.
What do lady dogs (bitches) wear to work?
Pant suits.
What do you call a dog wearing a beret?
Smeargle!
What did the house wear to the party? A dress.
Pep called; they want their unpadded bra back.