Clothing jokes
Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there's no multiplying.
What kind of jeans do you wear to church?
Holy jeans!
Yo mama's so fat, she irons her clothes on the driveway.
What did the tie say to the hat?
You go on ahead, I'll just hang around.
What did the shoes say to the pants?
"SUP, BRITCHES!"
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
Why do mermaids wear seashells?
They are too big for “B” shells, and too small for “D” shells.
What do you call pedophiles on a beach? Pedos in Speedos.
Jeff asks, "Did you hear about the guy they call the flash?"
Bob responds, "No, I haven't. Do they call him that because he runs fast?"
Jeff replies, "Nah, they call him that because he doesn't wear pants."
What shoes does a pedophile wear?
White vans.
They have a new line of socks for paraplegics.
They are so comfortable they can't even feel them.
Yo momma so stupid... weather man says it's chilly outside... instead of a jacket, she gets a bowl and spoon!
How do you know a hippie is on her period?
Her socks are missing.
How do you know she's off?
Her socks are tye-dye.
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
What do you call an alligator with a vest?
An investigator.
Why does Trump always ensure he has a second pair of pants with him every weekend?
In case he gets a hole in one.
Two silk worms got in a fight. It ended in a tie.
Why does Bill Clinton wear boxers? -- To keep his ankles warm.
Why was the homeless lady only wearing one sock?
She started her period.
Why do Scottish men wear kilts?
Sheep can hear unzipping trousers from a distance of 100 yards.