What does a roller coaster and Michael Jackson have in common?
Kids ride for free.
How do men like their women? Striped.
How does a priest like their children? Clean.
Why are most orphans strippers? They want to call someone mommy or daddy.
What is the difference between a stripper and candy? None. But they like it when you take the wrapper off.
An ugly, arrogant woman walked into a store with her 2 kids, yelling at them.
The store clerk pleasantly said, "Good morning ma'am and welcome. Nice children, are they twins?"
The ugly woman stopped yelling and said, "Hell no they are not, one is 9 and the other is 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just bloody stupid?"
The clerk replied, "I'm neither blind nor stupid ma'am, I just can't believe someone would screw you twice."
I'd like to have kids one day.
I don't think I could stand them any longer than that, though.
Did you hear about Johnny Depp's shelter for abused women? It's going as well as Michael Jackson's children's hospital!
what do blind kids and orhans have n common? both cant see their parents
A lot of people claim that white privilege does not exist. Well, how the hell do you explain Michael Jackson not being charged for raping children, despite ample evidence?
What's the difference between a Catholic hospital and Michael Jackson's Children's Hospital?
No seriously, what is it?
I went over to a crying child and said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at an orphanage!
What is the similarity of a bomb and a baby?
When you drop them both, everyone screams.
A proud father has six children. He always calls his wife "mother of six" to her displeasure.
One night at a party, he yells across the room, "Mom of six, we're going now." She replies: "I'll be right there, father of four."
Are you a school bus? Because I want to fill you with Kids.
I do consider Johnny Depp to be a victim of domestic violence.
Just like how I consider a children's hospital run by Michael Jackson and a retirement home run by Harold Shipman to be both safe places to be in.
A woman is on the edge of a bridge, about to commit suicide, when a strange man comes up to her.
"Tell me, why do you wish to end your life?" he asks in a booming but gentle voice.
"My children died last year in a car crash, I'm battling depression, my husband left me, and I lost my job," she sobs. "I don't wish to live anymore."
The man mulls this over, and proclaims, "I will solve all your problems, as I am a wizard and possess unfathomable abilities. However, you must grant me a blowjob first."
The delighted woman readily agrees, takes him below the bridge, and fulfills his request. After they're done, he asks, "How old are you?"
"37," she replies, wiping her mouth.
"You're 37 and you still believe in wizards?"
What's an orphan's favorite Roblox game?
Adopt Me.
Why does the Please Touch Museum sound like "police touch museum?"
Because they gotta watch out for the pedos.
knock knock. whos there? not your parents :) so kawaii fr
Why are orphans always famous?
Because they say, "Go big or go home," and orphans only have one option.
KFC proudly presents the kid fryer meal where our fillets are made out of kids. 😎 1 like = more kids in our fryer.
What do parents feeding their kids and terrorists have in common?
“Here comes the airplane!”
