Child jokes
Why can't orphans watch PG movies? Parental guidance.
A man boards a plane with six children of various ages.
After the plane takes off, a woman sitting behind the man asks him, “Are all of them yours?”
“No,” the man responds. “I work for a condom company and these are some of the customer complaints.”
If an illegal immigrant fights against a child molester, would that be "Alien vs Predator"?
My woman is a nine on a bad day, but she’ll be 10 on her birthday.
Jorden Calerendiá.
I bet you are a child molester who got out of jail and is now sexually harassing kids such as Addison! Will fuck off and get a life, by the way your roasts are not fucking funny they are bullshit like your face and your hairline.
Where do religious kids practice sports?
In the prayground.
What do you call an overly clingy child?
A tumor.
What did the orphan's mum say before she abandoned her child?
OH it's a bitch.
What do snowmen call snowballs?
Children!
Son: Mom, what's dark humor?
Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? Tell him to clap.
Son: Mom, I'm blind.
Mom: Exactly.
Orphan
Where do babies get baptized?
So the priest can wash their sex toys.
What's big, black, and touches children?
Harambe.
The parents used to hit him.
His parents got into a car crash and died.
He became an orphan in an orphanage. The people there hit him. He looked up and said "Parents?"
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
Mom: Let's have an adoption party!
Kid: *cries*
Mom: What's wrong?
Kid: I'M ADOPTED????
Why is it wrong to drive around in a van offering children candy?
Because you’ll have more success if you give out video games!
Dad: I’m taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Dad: Because you’re going to need them there.
Why did the little girl cry twice?
Because you wiped your shitty bloody duck on her favorite teddy bear.
Why does an orphan hate the internet?
Because he's always on the homepage.