Child jokes
What's a little white dot on a priest's dick? A baby tooth.
Why can't orphans play soccer? Because they can't practice with their dad.
A man takes a boy into the woods.
Boy says:
"Mister, I’m scared, and it’s dark and cold."
The Man: "How do you think I feel? I’m walking out here alone!"
What goes up but never past the digits 15?
A Make-A-Wish kid...
What is the difference between a small child and a watermelon?
One I eat on the daily and the other is a watermelon.
One day, Little Johnny walks in on his dad getting dressed and asked, "What is that, Daddy?" Dad said, "Oh, that's my snake." The next day, Little Johnny walks in on his mom getting dressed and asks, "What is that?" Mom says, "That's my bushes." The next day, Little Johnny can't sleep, so he goes into his parents' room and asks Dad, "Why is your snake going into Mom's bushes?"
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and the devil?
The devil always has horns... not just around children.
What do you call an overly clingy child?
A tumor.
What do snowmen call snowballs?
Children!
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
At least one of them gets picked.
What do you call an orphan?
A bootysnagger45.
What do you call a virgin kid locked in a room with a pedophile? Past tense.
Why don't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Remember kids, if ever you're bored, kick an orphan.
Who are they going to tell? Their parents?
How do you make an orphan cry? Ask to go over to his house if his parents are OK with it.
Mom: Can I tell you a joke?
Kid: Sure.
Mom: Knock knock.
Kid: Who's there?
Mom: Not yo.
Kid: Not yo who?
Mom: Not yo father.
Kid: Not yo husband either.
I saw a little boy playing alone in the street. I told him that was a bad idea, then asked for his parents.
God, orphanages are fun to work at!!
Ms. Smith: Johnny, when I was a little girl, I was told if I made ugly faces, it would freeze, and I would stay like that.
Little Johnny: Well, Ms. Smith, you can't say you weren't warned.
What does the child with no hands get for Christmas? Unknown. He hasn't opened it yet.
What does a homeless man in New York get for Christmas? Hypothermia.
What's an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it actually comes back.