Child jokes
What's worse than 100 dead babies in a skip?
The one that's still alive in the middle trying to eat its way out.
How do you know you've found a priest? When little Timmy is glued to his crotch.
The other day my mom called me a retard.
I'm now an orphan.
FICTIONAL BOOKS / AUTHORS
Outdoor Entertaining by Patty O.
Over the Mountaintop by Hugo First.
Plumbing for Idiots by Duane Pipes.
Music Theory by Amanda Lynn Player.
Meterology 101 By Wendy Reign and Sonny Daze.
Oh God By Dixie Rect.
Please Don't Stop By Craven Moorehead.
Life And Times Of A Porn Star By Dixie Normous.
Right Stuff By Dang Lin-Wang.
How To Take Care of Your Cat By Connie Lingus.
Right Way 2 Orgasm By Buster Cherry.
The Unwanted Child By Brooke N Rubbers.
Where do religious kids practice sports?
In the prayground.
Why are most dark jokes about orphans?
They can't complain to their parents.
What type of cookie has an orphan never had? Home made cookies ;)
Why can’t orphans go on school field trips?
[Parent’s signature: __________]
"It never gets old."
"Just like a sick kid!"
A toddler was giving her daddy a tea party.
She brought him a little cup of "tea" which was just water, of course. After several cups of tea, her Mom came home. Dad made her wait in the living room to watch his little Princess bring him a cup of tea, because it was, "Just the cutest thing!" Mom waited, and sure enough, here she come down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy. She watches him drink it up and then says, "You know the only place she can reach water, is the toilet!"
What say the child to the man? Shalom.
Man come later give the child: "Here, what you asked for!"
Child: "No, sir! I say Shabbat Shalom. I not ask for salmon!"
Man: "It may be the coin in me ear, hard to hear."
l li
ll l_
Craig Duncan is a child soldier with bad breath and has killed 5 people (on Fortnite).
Why can't a Chinese kid play baseball?
They ate the bat!
I make baby mush.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? Apples get picked. Orphans don't.
Why couldn't the orphan play baseball?
He could not find home.
What should you never say to an orphan?
"Your Mom."
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and the devil?
The devil always has horns... not just around children.
Dad: Ok son, if you fail this test, you're no longer my child, ok?
Son: Ok dad.
AFTER TEST
Dad: Hey son, how'd the test go?
Son: Son?