Child jokes
Why do orphans love school so much?
They have no HOMEWORK.
I saw a little kid crying today. I asked where his parents were, and he started to cry more. I left the orphanage to get some milk after that.
Did you know an apple and an orphan are different.
An apple gets picked.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where the home is.
Orphans have 362 days in a year because they don’t have a Mother’s or Father’s Day and no birthday.
Why can't an orphan eat a bag of chips?
Because the chip was family size.
Why can you hit an orphan?
They can't tell their parents.
If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?
Why couldn't the orphan play baseball?
They never reached home.
What's long, yellow, and can't swim?
A school bus full of children.
What did the boy with no hands get for his birthday?
Gloves!
JK, he hasn't opened it yet.
"Stupid ass baby."
Q: Who is Tracy Latimer's least favorite rapper?
A: Monoxide Child.
What is the difference between a tree and "walk walk" home from a tree house? 🏠
My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details, and we can drop them off tomorrow.
Why didn't the orphan play video games with his friends?
Because his parents wouldn't let him.
Went to school today, had to yell at my friend that he wasn't on the clock.
He continued to swing on the pole in front of children.
What do you call a baby in the crib?
Boys and girls watch Monsters, Inc.
What does an orphan and a wheelchair have in common?
They can both be replaced.
(There was a mommy tomato, a daddy tomato, and a baby tomato.)
Baby: Wait for me!
(Father tomato walks back toward the baby.)
(He squishes the child.)
Father: Ketchup!