Celebrity jokes
Chuck Norris has come in contact with Covid.
Covid is now in a 14-day quarantine.
I was gonna tell you a Kobe Bryant joke.
But it would just crash and burn.
This year I'm going to name my Christmas tree Amy Winehouse, because when it dies it will leave needles all over the living room.
Al Fayed’s son arrives at heaven’s gates and sees his driver.
He shouts “you stupid cunt!”
The driver says, “Watch, Boss?”
Dodi replies...:
“I said I WANT TO FUCK DI IN THE TUNNEL NOT FUCKING DIE IN THE TUNNEL!”
What actor does an orphan hate?
Vin Diesel.
Memes
Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson has made a laudable, command decision to omit real firearms from his movie sets.
This being the case, he ought to produce, direct, and star in his next movie titled: “The Rubber Gun Squad!” 👌 😉
Who remembers when Gwen was the only thing people talked about on this website?
Ariana Grande was in the store, and when she put her groceries on the counter, she said, "Thank you, next!"
I should name my dog Ariana Grande.
That way I could say that I fucked Ariana Grande.
What's Michael Jackson's favorite hobby?
Nothing because he's dead.
Two whores are watching the sun come up, splitting a bottle of Mad Dog and celebrating another night of servicing the general public. One asks the other: "Say. You ever been picked up by the fuzz?"
Her friend thinks it over, "No...but I have been swung around by the tits a few times!"
The other day I went on a romantic cruise in Hawaii. Then I met my girl Zendaya on board. She was shaking her ass and playing with her penis. Then she asked me, "Hey, you wanna make love in the cabin?" I said, "Sure, sweet thang," gave me her number, kissed me on the cheek. Next day she woke up because it was a romantic nightmare.
What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?
Little boys turn them on.
What pronouns does Michael Jackson use? Hee/hee.
Why does Michael Jackson avoid Pepsi? They gave him a hot one.
What song did Michael Jackson come up with after his first sleepover with the kid?
"Just Beat It."
Q: What do you call deaf Magic Johnson?
A: Hearing Aids.
One time Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction from eating 12-year-old nuts.
Why does an orphan's calendar only have 362 days? Because they don't celebrate Father's Day, Mother's Day, and Valentine's Day.
What's Michael Jackson's favorite drug? Crack.