Celebrity jokes
What's the difference between me and Bill Cosby?
I haven't been caught.
What did Stephen Hawking see before he died?
The blue screen of death.
Your hairline is so curvy now, Ice Spice has competition!
What’s the difference between Kendrick Lamar and an orphan?
He has family ties.
I’d make a joke to Fetty Wap on this, but there’s only a 50/50 chance he’ll SEE this.
Yo momma's so fat, her shirt size has more X's than Taylor Swift.
Your hairline's so ugly it made Michael Jackson lean back.
What did Bill Cosby say on the second date?
"Hi, nice to meet you."
What's Michael Jackson's favorite hobby?
Nothing because he's dead.
Michael Jackson was the King of Pop until he got burned by Pepsi. Now, Pepsi is the hero, and now, we know the rest of the story.
Why does Michael Jackson like football, baseball, and tennis? Because of the "balls".
Q: What did people say when Kim Kardashian was at the beach?
A: Stop littering!
What does Michael Jackson say when he gets hard? Ow!
What does Michael Jackson say when he grabs his crotch? I never noticed that before.
Two whores are watching the sun come up, splitting a bottle of Mad Dog and celebrating another night of servicing the general public. One asks the other: "Say. You ever been picked up by the fuzz?"
Her friend thinks it over, "No...but I have been swung around by the tits a few times!"
The other day I went on a romantic cruise in Hawaii. Then I met my girl Zendaya on board. She was shaking her ass and playing with her penis. Then she asked me, "Hey, you wanna make love in the cabin?" I said, "Sure, sweet thang," gave me her number, kissed me on the cheek. Next day she woke up because it was a romantic nightmare.
Paul Walker made a new wrap cover, it's called "Flying Through the Windshield," and the song's name is "Crossing the Street."
Chuck Norris makes the living room the dying room!
You could say Kobe's career went up in smoke.
Why does an orphan's calendar only have 362 days? Because they don't celebrate Father's Day, Mother's Day, and Valentine's Day.