My life, get it, 'cause I don't got one.
When you're mad, you might as well just punch an orphan because what can they do, tell their parents?
Hey, stinks, you know why? 'Cause your butts dry!
Why was the cow scared? Cause he had a nightmoo-r.
Did you hear about the Boston marathon? 'Cause, well, I heard it was a blast and that it blew everyone away!
"Why don't you want to taco 'bout it?"
"Cause I'm nacho friend anymore."
Q: Why did the vegetable cross the road?
A: 'Cause someone let go of the handle bars.
Why do cantaloupes always get married in the church?
'Cause they can't elope.
Why didn't the bitch ass skeleton fly?
'Cause me mum flew all the way and Trevor is a boofahead.
Why does this stingray's wife can't stop babbling?
'Cause she can't watch her mouth.
If you were a food, what would you be?
Friend 1: "Pizza, cause I'm so cheesy."
Friend 2: "Chocolate chip cookie, cause I have lots of friends."
Me: "Donut, cause I'm so empty inside."
Why dont cannibals eat clowns? Cause they taste funny.
They said I couldn't drive.
Now they know I can't cause they are all dead.
yo rob you for got to pay me cause u sucky sucky my thang aka your up for adoption
There was a little boy named Chris who was addicted to Roblox.
One day, his grandpa fell into a deep coma caused by a head injury.
One day, little Chris went to visit his poor grandpa. He brought his Windows 10 too, but it had no charge in it. After pulling out some wires and placing his into the wall, he started to hear a long beeping sound, but ignored it and continued to play Roblox. Chris's parents came and saw what had happened.
The dad then yelled, "You dumb f***, you killed my father!!!"
Then Chris said "Yeah. He was worth robucks, too."
Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? Why couldn't the pervert cross the road? Because his dick was in the chicken's ass!
Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream?
Because he was dead.
Q: There were two tampons walking down the road the other day. Guess what they said to each other?
A: Nothing, 'cause they're both stuck-up cunts.
Stephen Hawking died because he got hit by a RAM.
Why was the sun afraid of the ocean?
Cause 7 8 9
