Guy: Are you depression? 'Cause you're crippling me.
Car driver: No, I'm the guy that hit you with his car and crippled you.
Guy: Don't worry, I was already crippled because I got crippling depression.
Cause Jokes
Why do orphans only drink water in cereal?
'Cause Dad never brought home the milk...
Why couldn't the toilet cross the road?
Answer: 'Cause it got stuck in the crack.
Why don’t orphans play baseball? Cause they don’t know where home is!
Ashes to ashes, priests prefer boys, 'cause they don't have to shave their asses.
You know why you never wanna fly with an orphan?
'Cause then they know they won't die alone.
Dad: What did you learn in school today?
Timmy: Not enough, I guess, 'cause I gotta go back tomorrow.
Why don't orphans play baseball? Cause they don't know where home is!
Why can't orphans play House Flipper?
'Cause they don't know what to do.
Why can't orphans eat a big bag of crisps?
'Cause it's family size...?!
What do 9/11 and Covid-19 both have in common?
Asians caused them both!
What's worse, being loved or hated? 'Cause when you're loved you could be left alone or be betrayed, but when you're hated no one's there to leave you. What do you think?
Why can't orphans use a phone?
Because they can't find the home button.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was.
To bitch them is my real test, to train them is my cause.
I will travel across the land, searching far and wide.
Fuse Pokemon to UnderStand, the power that’s inside.
Poke him on! Gotta train them all it’s Fru and me, All I know is my dress tiny, Poke him on! Yeah, you’re my best friend, In a world you must defend, Poke him on! Gotta train them all my shirts so true, My outrage will flush us through. You bitch me and I ditch you, P-O-K-E-M-O-N!!! Gotta train them all, Gotta train them all! Pokemon!
Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.
So I found out a rainbow is basically where a guy ejaculates in a female's mouth and she swallows her period juice and they both kiss each other, swishing it together in each other's mouth, and it forms a rainbow.
And a strawberry shortcake is basically where a dude ejaculates on a female's face and then punches her in the nose, causing her to bleed. That's why it's called a strawberry shortcake.
Call me a bad economy with high interest rates and low spending, 'cause I'm in a great depression.
They say there's a person capable of murder in every friend group.
I suspected that it was Dave, so I killed him before he could cause any harm.
The cashier kicked me out because when he asked for 99 cents, I gave him 99 scents.
