Cant jokes
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
They don’t know where home is.
Why can’t orphans live?
They don’t have parents.
Two tourists climb a mountain that utters certain doom.
One tourist falls down. The tourist that's still on the mountain says, "You ok down there?"
The other tourist says, "Can't I just rest in peace?!"
Why can't antelopes get married?
Because they can't elope.
Can't wait for Stephen Hawking's next update.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
They can’t find home.
Why can't an orphan be in a relationship?
They have no one to call "daddy."
Why can black people post offensive jokes about making fun of white people, but white people can't post offensive jokes about making fun of black people? Because white people have white privilege. What happened to freedom of speech?
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find their way home.
Katy Perry can't sing, can't dance, doesn't write music, is unbelievably ugly, and is unable to decipher maths or science. Really though, I didn't realize going down on a record executive would later lead her to be one of the people able to go to space.
You're so fat you can't see your penis when you piss.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t have a home to run to.
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent.
Can't have a smoke with my girl after sex, she's asthmatic.
Plus, she's too young to smoke.
Why can’t baby ducks lay eggs? Because their quacks are too small.
Why can't Tottenham open a restaurant? Because they have no silverware.
You can't send an Indian to walk a corner. The only corner they will get to is 7-11.
Why do girls only stay in odd groups of friends?
Because they literally can't even.
Do you know why orphans can't get married?
Because they will never get their parents' blessing.
Why can't orphans suck dick?
Because they don't have a stepbro.