Cant jokes
Why can't a blind person eat fish?
They can't see food.
Why can't an orphan sign up for adoption websites?
Parental Login: __________
What do you call a deaf animal?
Anything, it can't hear you.
Why can't orphans be gay?
They don't have a closet to come out of.
The Titanic before the iceberg be like: "We can't go under it, we gotta go through it!"
His name rhymes with walking and talking, but he can’t do either.
A man hit a woman with his car, who is wrong?
The man, because you can’t drive into the kitchen.
Trying to find a good parking spot is a lot like trying to find a girlfriend.
If you can’t find one, you stick it in the disabled spot and hope nobody finds out.
I would say life's a joke, but I can't, because jokes have a meaning.
Why can't orphans eat chips?
Because they come in family size.
What does Johnny Depp hate about driving a car?
He can't drink and drive.
Why do orphans hate health ed at school?
Their parents can't opt them out of it.
An American bully goes up to an English kid and says, "You're ugly!"
And the English kid says, "Well, wanna know why you can't play Jenga?"
"Why?" says the bully.
"Because you haven't got a tower."
Why can't Asians play baseball?
Because they ate all the bats!
What is something you can’t say in a superhero movie?
“Is it a bird, is it a plane, well whatever it is, it’s heading straight for the World Trade Center.”
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys. It's true.
I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.
What do you call a blind German? Someone who can't Nazi!
I asked the gym instructor,
"Can you teach me to do the splits?"
"How flexible are you?" he asked.
"Well, I can't make it on Fridays."
Why can't people in wheelchairs be gay? Cuz you can't be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.
Why do orphans get to watch rated R movies? Because their parents can't stop them.