Cant jokes
Why is vegetable soup hard to cook? Because you can't fit the wheelchair in!
Can bees fly higher than Mt. Everest? No? Actually, they can. Mt. Everest can't fly.
Why can't orphans be gay?
They don't know who to call daddy.
These two cannibals are sitting by the campfire having dinner. One says, "I can't stand my mother-in-law." The other says, "So, just eat the potatoes."
What do you call a deaf animal?
Anything, it can't hear you.
Why can't a blind person eat fish?
They can't see food.
Why can't an orphan sign up for adoption websites?
Parental Login: __________
Why can't orphans be gay?
They don't have a closet to come out of.
The Titanic before the iceberg be like: "We can't go under it, we gotta go through it!"
A man hit a woman with his car, who is wrong?
The man, because you can’t drive into the kitchen.
What's the difference between Pink Floyd and George Floyd?
When Pink Floyd can't breathe, it's because all their fans are smoking pot.
What do you call a blind German? Someone who can't Nazi!
What does Johnny Depp hate about driving a car?
He can't drink and drive.
Why can't orphans eat chips?
Because they come in family size.
Trying to find a good parking spot is a lot like trying to find a girlfriend.
If you can’t find one, you stick it in the disabled spot and hope nobody finds out.
I would say life's a joke, but I can't, because jokes have a meaning.
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys. It's true.
I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.
I asked the gym instructor,
"Can you teach me to do the splits?"
"How flexible are you?" he asked.
"Well, I can't make it on Fridays."
What is something you can’t say in a superhero movie?
“Is it a bird, is it a plane, well whatever it is, it’s heading straight for the World Trade Center.”
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
They never reach home.