Cant jokes
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Dark jokes aren't funny... I can't see them at all.
Why does Blake eat cake? Because Caleb can't.
Why can't orphans play Monopoly?
Because they can't put a house.
I'm lonely, but all I have is my cheeseburger, but what is the matter of living if you only have one thing?
But a cheeseburger is all you need 'cause it has 1,000,000,000,000 bucks man, so I can't just take it and spend it wherever I want.
My teacher: Time can't count.
Me: Every second counts.
My teacher: Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhh!
Why can't the toilet paper be cheeky?
It's between cheeks at the moment.
You can't put an orphan on house arrest if there isn't a house to arrest them to.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home plate.
What’s yellow and can’t swim?
A bus full of kids.
Why can’t orphans live?
They don’t have parents.
Why can’t you yell at a kid?
Because the cops are after you.
It's okay to tell a Stephen Hawking joke if there are stairs in your house he can't get to you. Plus, he shut himself down, so it's all good :)
You other brothers can’t deny that she’s fly.
I can't stop thinking about those beans.
The only hood I like is pointy and white.
That's why I can't trust people when I don't see their face at night.
I'm supposed to put a joke here.
But I can't find a mirror...can you find one yourself?
I'm sure you'll laugh.
Little Johnny’s father walks into the bathroom and catches him masturbating. He says, “Son, every time you do that, you kill an innocent baby.”
The next day, his father walks into the bathroom and catches him again. Johnny says, “Bow your head, Dad. Can’t you see we’re having a funeral?”
Student: There are 505 rocks in a car. If 8 fall out, how many are left?
Teacher: There will be 497 rocks left.
Student: Ok!!
Student: How do you put an alligator in a closet?
Teacher: You can't, it won't fit.
Student: No!! Just open the door, put the alligator in, then close the door.
Teacher: Ohhh, now I get it.
Dead people can’t cross the street because they're dead, ha ha!