Can jokes

What can you do if you can't bear sharing the same blood as your father who raped you?

Have a blood transfusion.

What can you tell a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing that you haven't told her twice already.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a bucket of water.

WHERE DO THEY REALLY GO BECAUSE WATER CAN NOT BE AT THE TOP OF A HILL!?. I honestly think that only people with a physics degree can make nursery rhythms.

Why did the dinosaur take a bath?

So it can get ex-stinked!

Q: Why can kids relate to dogs?

A: They are noticed for 13 years, then left for no one to touch again.

What kind of birthday cake do you get on September 11th?

Three small ones, so you can have a flight of different cake flavors!

OK, OK, what's up with the fake Gwens? I am going to use a test to see who is real or not.

The real Gwen will know this. When did I come onto this website? Next question, what is my real name, and do I go on cursing rampages? Only the real Gwen can complete this test with the right answers.

Why can’t orphans play baseball?

'Cause they can never hit a homerun.

What kind of cake can an orphan not have?

Homemade.

When you ask your friend, "Can I hear a joke?"

"Sure."

"What do orphans and orange peels have the same?"

"What?"

"They both get thrown out."

Waiter: Can I have your order?

Me: No, it’s mine!

What did Nemo's dad say? "Man, he's a lot like my dad, I can never find him!"

Yo mama so fat I bet that her fart can clear a room in seconds.

Suicide isn't funny, but you can spice it up by wearing a fun hat.

Why do orphans wish they had a bounty on them so that they can be wanted?

U can vent here idc.

What’s bin Laden got in common with SpongeBob?

Both can be found at the bottom of the sea, and they’re filled with holes.

Can you f**k out of here?

Karen says:

I told some orphan that you can see your family, but I meant Spider-Man: Homecoming...

What has 4 limbs and can make a sidewalk red? Me falling from a 20 story building.