Can jokes

Why do orphans wish they had a bounty on them so that they can be wanted?

I told some orphan that you can see your family, but I meant Spider-Man: Homecoming...

What has 4 limbs and can make a sidewalk red? Me falling from a 20 story building.

Can you f**k out of here?

Karen says:

U can vent here idc.

You can hit an orphan, because who are they gonna tell? Their parents?

Did you know that if you die you can still be a part of family game night!

All you have to do is have your family cremate you and put you in an hour glass, and the games that use hour glasses, well, you will be a part of family game night.

Bob: Can I come to your house to meet your family?

Orphan: I don't have a family.

Boy: Hello, Mom, can I have $50?

Mom: Does it look like I am made of money?

Boy: That's what M.O.M. means, right?

To the guy in a wheelchair who stole my camouflage coat: you can hide, but you can't run.

Todoroki POV: All he can think about is Deku.

What do a priest and Christmas tree lights have in common?

They can both flash.

What's one advantage of being an orphan?

Nobody can make mama jokes about you. 🌚

If you call the number 800-273-8500 in Afghanistan, they say, "Can you fly a plane?"

Guys, can we change pride month to another month, please? My birthday is in June, and I'm not gay, and my friends keep making fun of me. I think we should change it to March because my brother's birthday is in March, and that'd be funny.

When you're so rich that you can buy anything, you end up getting a cow in your living room. Yeah, anyways, my ex is still in my living room.

You're so tall you can go see God, but you're so tall your balls got small.

It's really great that you can make fun of orphans, 'cause what are they going to do? Tell their parents?

What time is it when you can smell smoke inside?

Time to get outside!

I’ll pat your breasts, pat your breasts, cos I’m a baker’s man, and you better bring me an orgasm as fast as you can. I’ll pat you, and prick you, and mark you with my "D", And then throw you in the fire cos you’re now worthless to me!