Call jokes
A blind teenager who is bad at reading wants to go hunting, so he finds a hunting ground called s-ch-ool.
What do you call a planet that poops? Uranus.
My family chastises me for MY job, but you should hear how my family provides "customer service" at their jobs. My mother works as a social worker and answers the phone like, "DYFS, you beat em, we treat em." My grandmother is a Medical Examiner and she answers the phone like, "City Morgue, you kill em, we chill em." These bitches have no class! I'm an actress and studio secretary. When you call the studio, I answer the phone professionally like, "Good afternoon. IHOP, International House Of Pussy. Creampie Cassie speaking."
If she refuses to suck and threatens to bite, just knock her teeth out. Call it the “Bloody Gummer”.
What do you call a two-dimensional owl? A Paper Towl!
Memes
What do you call a bus full of white people?
A TWINKiE!!!
What do you call a flying octopus?
An octocopter! 🚁
Cesar: What was that good salad called?
Servant: Ceaser, Cesar.
Cesar: Okay, what's going to be the weather like?
Servant: Hail, Cesar.
Cesar: Yes, I know "Hail Cesar," but I need to know what the weather's like!
Servant: Well, it's hail, Cesar.
Cesar: AHHHHH! Send him to the DUNGEONS! NOW!
What do you call a load of retards in a swimming pool?
Vegetable soup.
Josh: What’s the useless piece of skin around the vagina called?
Daniel: Isn’t it the women?
Josh: Oh yes, that’s right.
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay, they would be called bagels.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman? A combo meal.
What do you call a nervous Jedi?
Panakin.
What do you call a male cow who’s taking a nap?
A bull dozer.
Why can’t orphans get in trouble?
Because there’s no one to give a phone call home to.
What do you call a Chinese baby?
Sum Ting Wong.
What do you call a fat person in a wheelchair?
A broken wheelchair.
What do you call a blank piece of paper?
Women's rights.
What do you call a rare fart in Egypt? A toot uncommon!
What do you call a dolphin in the woods? Dead.