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Call jokes

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Inspector

  • Inside a room full of squares, buckets, and tints, there are two inspectors. One is called Mr. Right, the other one is called Mr. Wrong. Because of their names, the first one is trusted more than the second one.

    Mr. Wrong eventually got tired of that and worked on a plan for how more people could trust him. He took a jigsaw and he started to cut into his brain and sawed away half of his brain. It was still working.

    Then he took a loaf of toast, cut it into half and glued it on his head, and then he made a strawberry cream and sprayed it on the toast. Because people couldn't recognize him as "Mr. Wrong," he was able to solve more cases.

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  • Little Johnny

  • Mom: Go clean your room, Little Johnny.

    Little Johnny: No, it’s my room.

    Mom: Well, it’s my house.

    Little Johnny: Then go clean it.

    Mom: Go to school!

    At school:

    Teacher: Hi, Little Johnny. You’re late.

    Little Johnny: Watch because my son of a bitch mom told me to clean her room. I told her no, it’s my room, and then she said, 'Well, it’s my house.' Then I said, 'Go clean it,' and then she told me to go to school.

    Teacher: Johnny, go to the principal’s office! You just came into school and now you're causing trouble. Go!

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    Strap

  • You're walking into a bar and you see 2 younger kids around 18. You call the manager to have them removed, but no one came down.

    Later that night, you see the 2 18-year-olds, 1 was a girl and the other was a boy, so you call the manager down. No one came again. You confront them and tell them to leave, but one turns around and hits you. You are knocked out on the floor. When you wake up, there is a hard feeling in your a**. You turn your head around and there is an autistic girl with a strap-on in your a** going full on hard.

    Family

  • Son: “Mom, is there a thing called «friendship» between a man and a woman?”

    Mother: “No Son, unless if he’s gay.”

    Son: “So your friend is gay?”

    Mother with herself: «How did he see me with michael omg if my husband discovered my cheating he will kill me»

    Mother: “Mmm.. Yes.”

    Father loudly: “YES!!!”

    Mother: “What in the hell? Are you gay?”

    Father with himself: «Am i an idiot why did i yell?! if she discovered I’m gay and her son was made by Paul’s semens she will kill me»

    Father: “No what are saying? I’m just talking with myself.”

    *A few hours later*

    Mother: “I will go to visit my mother.”

    Father: “Me too I will go to visit my mother.”

    Son: “Not me too I will go to stud with my friends.”

    The mother and the father goes to michael’s house and they found their son playing with Michael and Paul is recording them and saying: «that’s why I love you my actual son oh only if your mother knows».

    *The End* :D

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    Banana

  • What do you call a weak, beta, tall and dumb kid? A banana.

    But if you're vegan, you call him food.

    If you're poor, you eat the skin.

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    Guy

  • What do you call a guy in a wheelchair playing soccer?

    Rocket League!

    (Ali A Intro)

    I like men.

    Wanna smash?

    Suck my balls.

    I'm in class as I'm posting this ass joke.

    This joke sucks terribly.

    Honestly just like and leave.

    Add me on discord.

    IceyTrae#2230

    Lebron>MJ

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    Teacher

  • The teacher asked the class what they wanted to be when they grew up.

    Johnny said when he grows up he's going to be a motherfucking hustler. He's going to have a wife and live in a big house in the country with maids and butlers and drive a Rolls-Royce, and he's also going to have an apartment in the city where his side bitch is going to live. He's going to buy her expensive jewelry, whatever she wants: cars, diamonds, clothes, shoes.

    The teacher didn't know what to say, so she calls on Sally. "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

    Sally said, "I want to be Johnny's bitch."

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    Reason

  • Stop ruining the jokes. It's called "worst jokes ever" for a reason. We all feel bad for orphans, but people like dark humor and joke about everyone, so quit being offended, please.