Call jokes
Teacher: We have a new student today class, come introduce yourself.
Student: My name is Buttitches.
Teacher: Please tell us your real name.
Student: Buttitches.
Teacher: I’m calling the police.
Police: Son, please tell me your real name or I’m going to shoot you.
Student: Buttitches.
Police: *shoots gun.*
A few days later, the police go to the funeral and sits behind the mom. While crying, the mom says, "My Buttitches!" The police say, "We’ll scratch it, lady."
Jay and Andrew are best friends who are almost alike. The difference between them both is Jay is poor and well... Andrew, on the other hand, is suck-a-dick poor. Let me explain, Jay wakes up in his room, walks to the kitchen, and asks his mom, Lisa (I call her Lisa now, btw), if there is anything to eat. "No, bitch!" she replies, so Jay drinks a glass of milk and goes back to bed.
Now Andrew... wakes up, jumps out of bed, and he's in the kitchen. He sees his mom fixing some food for work after a long hard night of giving her husband blue balls. "Anything left for me, Mother?" Andrew asks. "Sorry, Honey, I have to eat to put food on the table and to get the running again." *so she goes to work, taking her time* Andrew sits by his bedside and says to himself, "Man... I'd suck a dick for some water right now." *his mom storms back after hearing what he had said* "I'll buy you a soda if you do my first customer for me!"
What do you call a surprised Chinese man?
Ho Lee Fuk.
What do you call a cat with a live in doctor?
An anemic, shrivelled cat with desperate attached owners.
What do you call nuts on a chin?
My penis in your mouth.
Memes
What do Call of Duty players say when they shoot up a school?
654-721-8940
(If you understand the joke, you're a god.)
They call it the Cold War because Russia is cold in 2 ways.
What do you call two Michael J. Fox's standing next to each other?
Parallel Parkinson's.
What do you call a clown that is allergic to strawberries?
...Ollie the clown!
What does an Asian call a penis? A wong.
What does an Asian do with its legs? It wok.
What do you call my IP? 74.125.224.72 hahahahahahahahaha
What do you call a bear with no ears? A b.
Yeah, that joke was unbearable.
What do you call a knight that has one arm? A first battle night.
What do you call a knight that lost both arms? A two battle useless knight.
What do you call a white girl at Starbucks?
At home.
I'm in the alagba association. Call 666-666-666 to join the gang. It's free and free kills duidui.
I have a friend named Mole.
She plays a game called "sandbox" to dig up dirt...
What do you call a pig with two legs? Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhahahaa
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
What do you call Stephen Hawking when he eats too much?
As fat as Ben Dingley.
My girlfriend called me a pedophile... That's a big word for a 1st grader.