Call jokes
What do you call an abo with a shotgun?
Sir.
What do you call a pig with no legs?
A groundhog.
What do you call a Punjabi that’s drowning? Mandeep.
Little Johnny walked into the bathroom while his dad was taking a dump. As soon as Little Johnny walked in, his dad let out a big FART! Little Johnny said, “WHAT WAS THAT?” His dad said, “That was the sound of the north wind.” The next day his teacher asked the class, “What’s the direction of the north wind?” Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher called on him and he said, “TEACH IT’S MY DADDY’S BOOTY!”
What do you call an orphan who became a priest?
Father-less.
What do you call a walkie-talkie for retards? -- A stumblie-mumblie.
When someone has an imaginary friend, you call them weird and crazy.
But when a group of people have an imaginary friend, you call it religion. :)
What do you call a fat, lazy person who smokes weed? A baked potato.
What do you call a mix of nuts, bolts, and my ex?
A roTHOT.
LBB- me and Shrek built a theme park for you mummy and it’s called Dummy pee pee poo poo doo doo land because Shrek likes to poop.
Shrek- Should I pull the trap?
*LBB’s mom walks into the trap*
LBB and Shrek- surprise we’re mailing you to Peepoo Peepoo AB
What do you call an injured Panera Bread?
Panera Bled.
What do you call an Asian, a blind man, and a very bad driver?
Your mum is so fat that when she wore a yellow coat people called taxi!
What do you call an Italian dog?
A labra-noodle.
What do you call a person who's got their wisdom tooth removed too late?
Dumb.
What do you call someone who is extra virgin?
Mrs. Frame.
What do you call a cow who's personality is down to Earth?
Ground beef.
What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?
An irrel-elephant ;)
A no legged manager runs the nearest pizza place called Your Pizza Is A Joke.
I (J0K35) worked there and this happened...
Manager: WHY ARE THE PINEAPPLES IN THE TRASH?
Me: Because nobody eats fucking pineapple pizza.
Manager: THAT'S IT! I'M KICKING YOU OUT OF THIS PLACE!
Me: You can't kick me out.
Manager: Why not? Huh?
Me: Because you need legs to kick, and you don't have any.
What do you call a batter in a hot air balloon?