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Call jokes

Robber

    • Little Johnny was walking on the street alone one day and saw a robber. Little Johnny says to him "Give the mother fucking broken ass piece of shit back!"

    To which the robber says "FUCK YOU! I don't wanna."

    Little Johnny calls the police and says "A robber is stealing a broken ass piece of shit purse."

    The police said "How old are you?"

    Little Johnny then hangs up the phone.

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    • Call memes

    Poem

    • In Mia's world, where bottles and parrots meet, A whimsical symphony takes its seat.

    With feathers ablaze, the parrots take flight, Their vibrant hues painting the day with delight.

    Mia, a dreamer with a heart full of glee, Embraces the beauty for all to see.

    Her bottles, like whispers of stories untold, Capture the magic that time cannot hold.

    Each bottle, a vessel of dreams and desires, Unveiling the soul's deepest fires.

    They dance in the sunlight, sparkle and gleam, A kaleidoscope of colors in Mia's dream.

    Parrots, enchanting with melodies rare, Sing ballads of love, floating through the air.

    Their voices, like echoes of nature's sweet call, Enchanting all hearts, big and small.

    Mia, with reverence, sets the parrots free, To soar across oceans, to distant lands and seas.

    In their freedom, they find their truest grace, A testament to love's boundless space.

    And as Mia's bottles journey afar, They carry her dreams, like a guiding star.

    Through mountains and valleys, they'll forever roam, In the hearts of dreamers, they'll always find home.

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    • Wrestler

    • There was an American wrestler from Texas named John, who throughout his high school career had never lost a match. As he went on into college he continued undefeated. He became a national icon and symbol of American strength.

    News began to circulate of a Russian wrestler who was fierce and unstoppable. As each wrestler's legends grew, a match was set up between the two, America versus Russia. The match would be held in Texas.

    John began training immediately. Every day his coach would tell him, “This Russian has a move called the Mongolian Death Grip. No one has ever escaped the Mongolian Death Grip. DO NOT let him get you in the Mongolian Death Grip.”

    The day of the match finally came. Just before each wrestler stepped onto the mat in front of the capacity crowd, the coach once again said, “Whatever you do, do not let him get you in the Mongolian death grip. No one has ever escaped the Mongolian death grip.”

    Four seconds into the match, the Russian had the American in the Mongolian death grip. The coach buried his face into his hands and cursed John for not listening to his advice. All of the sudden he heard the crowd irrupt in a chant of USA USA USA. He looked up and saw the Russian pinned by John. The coach ran out to meet John and embarrassingly told him, “I didn’t see... Once he had you in the Mongolian Death Grip I looked away. How in the world did you get out of the Mongolian death grip?”

    With heavy breath, John told him, “Well coach, that Russian grabbed me and twisted my body in ways I never imagined possible. I was wincing in pain when I open my eyes and right in front of me were two testicles. So I bit them.”

    “What???” Said the coach... “John I don’t think that is legal. You could be disqualified.”

    “I don’t know about that coach. But I can tell you one thing. You ain’t got no idea how strong you are until you bite your own balls.”

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    • Roman Catholic

    • Why do Roman Catholics always call their minister father?

    because Roman Catholic men between 18-29 years old received a free anonymous blowjob inside the confessional booth at the glory hole.

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