Call jokes
What do you call an infant with no legs?
Ground beef.
What do you call a three-humped camel?
Pregnant.
Why is he called Stephen Hawking?
Because he is always trying to hawk up phlegm to clear his throat.
Some of the most convincing people you'll ever listen to are born liars; usually they're called politicians.
My grandfather says I’m too reliant on technology.
I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
What do you call a rapper who's always sleepy?
NAP-TAIN
Somebody called the cops for a school shooting, what a snitch!
What do you call a fat chink?
Saturn.
I'm just happy no idiots are calling these people fat-phobic.
You're old enough to remember when emojis were called "hieroglyphics."
What do you call a sad coffee?
Despesso.
Confusion life question!!!
* Can you cry underwater? * Do fishes ever get thirsty? * Why don't birds fall out the tree when they sleep? * Why is a building called that when it's already built? * When they say dog food is new and improved, who tastes it?
What do you call a whiteboard that is dirty?
A dirty whiteboard.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
What do you call a person without a nose and who doesn't know much?
Nose-less.
Bee Jokes:
"Hello."
"Oh, hello, Buzzy!"
"Why are ya calling me Buzzy this whole time?"
"Because you BEE BUZZing!" (Laughs)
"It's not funny! Jokes are the worst, although I hate those Bee Jokes!"
"Chillax bro. Don't BEE a hater of jokes, dude!" (Laughs)
"Aagh! You always had a choice, but I will sting ya face!"
"No! You BEE like pollen to make HONEY-moon." (Laughs)
"Stoooop!! I'm outta here, your worst fan."
"Fan?"
"Yes, your worst fan!"
"No! Fan!"
"What?! Aaaaaauuuuggghhhh!!!"
"Ohhh! Buzzy's looking BEE-wind!" (Laughs)
What do you call a gay T-Rex?
A tyranno-sore-ass!
Who does Adolph Hitler call in an emergency?
Nein, nein, nein!
What do you call the day before Christmas Eve? Christmas Adam.
Teacher: If you keep talking over me, I'll call your parents!
Orphan: You will?