Call jokes
A black n***a crashes a neighborhood barbecue, bragging about his 'hood credentials' while hogging all the ribs and collard greens. The host calls him out, 'Yo, pay up or get out. Ain't no freebies here.' He laughs it off, 'Man, I run this block!' But the host's burly brother, who's been grilling the whole time, snarls, 'Wrong, fool. Time to settle the score.' He pins him against the picnic table, wraps a chain leash around his neck from the dog run, edges him with a vibrating basting brush slathered in hot sauce, and then plows his ass deep and hard, grunting, 'Now you're the main course, spicier than the jerk chicken!'
What would you do if you see a guy suffocating from the heat? I would call and dial 911, holy shit!
I just found out that one of the new Star Wars shows is going to be about the time that some malware overloaded all of their computers, and I can tell from the title that those computers use Windows!
It's called "The Bad Batch File!"
So, I got a paper towel roll, ripped it, but started to fart when I ripped it off, and stopped farting when I got it off the roll, and then I said, "I guess that's why it's called ripping one!"
What do you call an ass that’s a DETECTIVE?
An undercover pooper.
Sometimes, you've got to specifically go out of your way to get into trouble. It's called fun.
What do you call six gay people in a war? Rainbow Six Siege.
Q: What do you call an owner that can't take care of their cat? A: A impurrefect owner.
What do you call a Black Iron Man?
Robert Browny Jr.
What do you call a snail without a shell?
Dead.
What do you call mo on a dating website? Tissue face.
I had a friend named Wemiyoe... We call him "we me you."
What do you call a talentless Korean person? Us Lee Less!
What do you call a letter using the bathroom?
The P.
What do you call a peanut on the allergy table?
A kill streak.
Pokemon: What do you call a killer that uses psycho powers?
Mr. Mime!
What do you call a chair that smokes weed?
A high chair.
What do you call onions and beans?
Tear gas.
There's a new bird disease, it's called churpies.
It's a canariel disease, untweetable.
My grandfather says I’m too reliant on technology.
I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.