What do you call a cute door?
Adoorable.
What do you call an athlete who injured 75% of his spine?
A quarterback.
What do you call disabled people in a hot tub? -- Vegetable soup.
I hate people who get offended here, like seriously, it's called dark humor for a reason.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special Forces.
Three dead bodies are delivered to the mortuary one day. Each of them has a great big smile on their face.
The coroner examines the bodies and then calls the police to tell them what has happened.
"First body: Frenchman, 60, died of heart failure while making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile, Inspector," says the coroner.
"Second body: Scotsman, 25, won a thousand pounds on the lottery, spent it all on whisky. Died of alcohol poisoning, hence the smile."
The inspector then asks, "What about the third body?"
"Ah," says the coroner, "This is the most unusual one. Billy-Bob the redneck from Oklahoma, 30, struck by lightning."
"Why is he smiling then?" asks the inspector.
"He thought he was having his picture taken."
Have you heard of the... uh Pokemon called uh rhy... rhy... Rhydon deez nuts?
How many Karens does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one...to call 911 and demand a cop come do something about the intimidating blackness.