Call jokes
What do you call a school bus that you cannot drive?
A friend.
What do you call a gay woman? I don't know.
What do you call purple when it's being mean? Violent.
What do you call a bad bitch? You call them stupid bitches.
Michael J. Fox loves to cook, especially desserts. They now call him "Shake and Bake".
What do you call an emo with no legs?
Emobile.
Ejaculated in her braces, call that children behind bars.
What do you call Dominos when it doesn't know how to cook pizza?
Domi-don't-knows...
A boy walks into some woods with a phone, and his friend comes by and asks, "What are you doing?"
He pauses, then says, "Trying some bird calls!"
A nickname to call your short GF:
Little ankle biter Master Yoda Hasbula My little Ewok
What do you call a premature Chinese baby birth? Wong Tai-Ming.
What do you call a tent for lesbians?
Finger Hut.
Apparently, rich people have the smallest penises. It makes sense why Bill Gates called it "MicroSoft."
Rachel won the lottery twice in two years. Her friend Jim called her every day asking for tips on winning, just the same. Then one day, simply to get rid of him, Rachel said, "Watch two martial arts movies, eat three pieces of hard beef jerky, and pick a fight at a bar."
Jim replied with a shocked look, "That's what I do after Mr. Tugman shakes my hand too long."
What do you call a mountain of kittens? A meowtain.
What do you call a wife who knows where her husband is at all times?
A widow.
Teacher: *calls you up to the board*. You: Ok. *Gets intense boner* *has to fart really bad* You: F***!!!!!!!
What do you call it when Panera Bread is a book?
Panera Read.
What do you call all down syndromes?
Twins.
What do you call 2 nuns and a prostitute that play football?
Two tight ends and a wide receiver.