Sister: You're so stupid.
Me: Calling me stupid doesn't make you any smarter!
Call Jokes
Confusion life question!!!
* Can you cry underwater? * Do fishes ever get thirsty? * Why don't birds fall out the tree when they sleep? * Why is a building called that when it's already built? * When they say dog food is new and improved, who tastes it?
What do you call a pole dancer?
A stripper.
What do they call Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson's son? The Pebble.
What do you call an Asian Chihuahua?
A Konichiuahua.
I made a playlist for hiking. It has music from Peanuts, the Cranberries, and Eminem.
I call it my trail mix.
What do you call Helen Keller after she killed 10 people?
Helen Killer.
Papyrus: Sans, I have a joke. What do you call someone lazy and incompetent?
Sans: What do you call them?
Papyrus: YOU! NOW GET UP AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM, YOU LAZY BONES!
What do you call a bowling ball that falls from the sky and knocks down all the bowling pins?
An airstrike.
What do you call a cut cucumber?
A guy with no legs.
What's WWE called in Africa?
Shadow fight.
I set a gay person on fire. We now call him LGBBQ.
What do you call Moby Dick's dad?
Papa Boner.
What do you call a guy from India calling you?
A scammer.
What do you call my friends?...
Short.
What's the best comeback for a person calling you an orphan?
Kill their parents.
What do you call a fudge packer who has special needs?
A gay black male that has Down Syndrome.
What’s it called when you give an emo some rope as a present?
Murder.
What do you call a group of cops having a sleep over?
Pigs in a blanket.
So, this guy, right? He has been through the worst shit in his life. He lost his house, his car, his wife, his kids, everything except his dog.
About 2 weeks after he loses everything, he goes to apply for a job. He attends work for the first 2 weeks to get his first paycheck and then calls in sick for about a month. He comes back to his boss' office after the month is over and his boss questions him. The man claims, "Sir, I was blowing chunks." "What do you mean by 'blowing chunks'?" says the boss. The man replies with, "Chunks is the name of my dog..."
