Call jokes

There was an illegal alien woman who wanted to be called "undocumented." So, I had "undocumented" sex with her and threatened to have her deported if she reported me for rape. I'd call it even.

What do you call a potato with a pp?

A dictator.

What do you call basketball for disabled people?

Rocket League?

What do you call sweaty titties?

Humititties.

What do you call a whale on a beach?

Banked.

When David lost his ID, I called him Dave. Where did Dave go during the bombing? Everywhere. Guess who came crawling back?

What do you call a bored robot?

A “sigh”-borg.

What do you call the American healthcare plan for poor people?

Death.

What is Instagram called in USA?

Instaounce.

If Jesus was real, they wouldn’t call it the crucifixion. They would call it crucifact.

What do you call someone with no legs?

Disabled.

What do Mexicans call a wall? A ladder.

A girl said she liked dogs. I called her a bitch.

So one time I had a dream where I was on a road trip and we drove a golf cart and a Susan, which I don’t know why the heck the name of the car was called a Susan.

We went into this house and there was like a woman there and we went into this bathroom which looked like a public bathroom, which was so weird!

What do you call when an orphan takes a selfie?

A family photo.

What do you call a hungry person?

African.

What do you call a disabled person that can walk?

Enabled.

What's a name orphans hate to be called?

"Homie."

What do you call a flying Aboriginal?

Boong 747.

What do you call an orphan in a wheelchair running into fire?

Hot wheels.