I got a part in a movie called "Cocaine." I only have one line.
What do you call a guy who loves to eat out a hoe's pussy?
Answer: a Carnivwhore.
What do you call a basketball player with erectile dysfunction?
Tragic Johnson.
What do you call a smart person in America?
A tourist.
What do you call a group of Alabama superheroes?
The Incredibles.
Some guy called me a tool. So I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend. Guess he was right.
What do you call a well endowed gay male who is also in a wheelchair?
Meals on wheels.
Have you heard of the show Naked and Afraid?
That's what I call hide and seek with my uncle.
What do you call a 5th grader with no friends?
Sandy Hook survivor.
Your hairline is so long, people call it "The Natural Disaster!"
Calling Alabama's football team an astonishment would be the biggest understatement of the century, especially since they continuously catch balls from someone who isn't related to them.
What do you call an Australian visiting the UK on holiday?
Returning to the scene of the crime.
What do you call a paraplegic stuck in a tower?
In trouble!
What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? A roamin' Catholic.
What do you call a Trump Supporter?
A piece of $hit!
My friend called me fat, so I challenged him to a running race.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES winter sports?
Ice Cube.
What do you call it when Panera Bread decapitates someone?
Panera Behead.
What do you call it when someone lies to Panera Bread?
Panera misled.
What do you call it when you choose Panera Bread over something else?
Panera instead.