Business jokes
I heard every single machine in the coin factory just broke down all of a sudden.
It just doesn’t make any cents!
Two men were bartering over a marble slab. A lot of counter-offers were made.
Can orphans eat at a family restaurant?
If you start at a bait shop, you're an amateur baiter, but once you achieve the highest level, you become a master baiter. Now buy a shrimp boat and become a master baiter on a shrimp boat.
Why did the man decide to work at a pizza place?
Because he kneaded the dough!
How do we know the Ancient Egyptians were into organized crime?
They were always using pyramid schemes!
How to decorate a wall:
Strip off the paper and original plaster.
Put on fresh plaster and wallpaper.
Paint it (if you want).
Send a bill to North America and wait patiently for a reply.
A man opened a snail farm.
He said that it is a slow-moving business.
Never invest in funerals. It's a dying industry.
Where do Dairy Queen and Burger King go after dinner?
White Castle.
What did the watch say to the failing watch company?
"You better watch it!"
What happened when the gun dealer found his pistol in his shoe?
He found that he had a piece in his sole!
A Mexican opens a pharmacy in CA. What’s he selling?
Drugs.
What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender? I don’t know. I was too busy wanking.
What do you call a private nun?
Nun-o-yo-business.
A man went to a Ford dealership hoping to find a car, but he said they weren't affordable.
I walked into a store, and I pointed a stick to the roof and said, "This is a stick up!"
I opened a company selling landmines disguised as prayer mats. Prophets are going through the roof.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A hooker can wash her crack and resell it.
Did you hear about the restaurant they're putting on the moon?
Good food, but no atmosphere.