Bus jokes

I love jokes about buses.

Why did Sally fall off the swing?

Because she was hit by a bus.

I got hit by a bus.

But the bus was my ex.

What's the difference between a bus full of children and a fish?

The fish can swim.

So I was looking through my pictures and I found a picture of a random kid that took a picture of his ugly face. It looked like someone that got hit by a car, then a bus, then a semi.

That’s what I get for not having a password on my iPad.

What has 30 legs but can't swim?

A bus full of children!

Yo momma so dumb, she got kicked off the short bus.

What do you call a bus full of stoners?

The Magic School Bus.

A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.

What is a bus driver that does not work? A useless one!

Yo mama so fat, a bus ran into her and she said, "WHO THREW THAT TWINKIE AT ME?!"

What did the bus driver say to the lady with one leg?

Hop on.

What did Columbus use to cross the ocean?

He used a bus.

What do you call a bus going backwards? A sub.

What is the difference between a school bus and a baseball?

You can throw a baseball, and you can’t throw a school bus.

Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

Why'd Sally drop her ice cream?

She was hit by a bus.

I would like to dedicate this song to a friend of mine, who was run over last week and is in hospital.

The wheels on the bus go round and round!

What's the difference between a school bus and a cactus?

On a school bus, the pricks are on the inside.

What do you call an all-you-can-eat buffet for a pedophile? A school bus.