Building jokes
How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together!
How to commit arson:
1. Burn down an orphanage.
I want to tell you a joke about 9/11... but I'm afraid it will be the bomb.
Why did my dad cross the road?
To get to the nearest building so he wouldn't die in the crippling smoke of the most terrifying and only terrorist attack on American soil.
Why do orphans love elevators?
They raise people!
Why go across town when you can go across the hall?
What did the terrorist think to himself seconds before hitting the tower?
"Did I leave the stove on?"
Two people are sitting in a skyscraper.
P1: Hey, what wifi are you connected to? The company wifi is horrible.
P2: Airplane wifi.
What's a tower's favorite bagel? I don't know, but it ain't plain.
What is another name for 9/11?
A forbidden game of Jenga.
I met a girl that was 6'5" and she fell on 9/11 and broke her arm. She really said "oh snap" like a twin tower.
What does a skeleton tile his roof with? Shingles!
The last time I had flying lessons, I hit some building in Manhattan. Then my Uncle got shot in 2008. Darn...
A blondie and a redneck jumped off a building. Which one will land first?
The redneck because the blonde will ask for directions.
Where did the orphans go when the orphanage blew up?
Everywhere.
As a hobby, I started taking walks around the old clock tower.
It's a great way to pass the time.
Who are the fastest readers?
9/11 victims because they went through 80 stories in 10 seconds. 😂
What do you call sex in the World Trade Center?
An inside job.
The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plane.
Here's a list of puns, not all of them are mine.
1. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork, but the heavier ones need a crane.
2. Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
3. My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.
4. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.
5. Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
6. Why was the cookie sad? Because his mom was a wafer long!
7. Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!
8. How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!
9. That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!
10. My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore. Or else they’ll ground me!