Your so poor people break into your house and leave things
What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel?
It is ground breaking!
What’s the worst part about breaking up with a Japanese person
You have to drop the bomb twice before they get the message
Q: What is the difference between a stripper and a bungee cord?
A: It is cheap fast, and if the rubber breaks, your pretty much screwed.
Dad: "if they jumped off a bridge would you?" Tommy: "yes, cuz there would be a body pile to break my fall!"
How is having fun with a prostitute like bungee jumping?
You’re dead if the rubber breaks.
A retard won a break-dancing competition. All he did was go to get a drink
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was emotionally distressed after a break up and wanted to find some help at his friends pen, in the end he was run over by a car, marking a sad end to what might have been a good chickens life
A boy breaks a vase and his mom says its ok honey mistakes happen how do you think you were born
guys don’t let nobody hurt you with words like someone once said sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me
Why did the astronaut return to Earth?
She went on her launch break! 🚀🥪😋
why does a movie set say break a leg? because they have a CAST
How did the cow break up with the other cow? He said he moo-ved on
When the school shooter breaks into your classroom so you try to say goodbye to your Roblox gf but then the shooter's phone goes off.
A robber breaks into a house while the residents are away one dark night. Eager to see what he can loot, he quickly starts searching through cupboards and dressers, grabbing valuables with a trained eye. Suddenly, he hears a voice come out of nowhere. "Jesus is watching you." The criminal jumps, scared the residents are back, and freezes. After a few minutes of silence however, he assumes it was his imagination, and goes back to robbing. A couple minutes pass, before once again, the voice returns. "Jesus is watching you." Quite confused, the thief searches the house and checks the front door, but nothing pops out as unusual. He finally decides to move rooms, and finds a parrot, but ignores it. Before he can begin to do anything, someone speaks again, "Jesus is watching you." The robber realized it was the parrot talking! Going to the parrot, he asks it, "Are you the one who's been talking to me?" The parrot responds, "Yes." The thief couldn't believe it. So, he asks another question. "What is your name?" "Ismael." the parrot replies. The man scoffed. "What type of idiot names a parrot Ismael?" The parrot speaks yet again, "The same type of idiot that names a Rottweiler Jesus."
When you tell your Roblox girlfriend you’re breaking up with her and then 10 seconds later you hear your uncle crying in the other room.
The shovel is a Ground Breaking invention. *Slaps and laugh*
When you break up with your online girlfriend, and you hear your uncle crying in the other room.
A mirror and a beer bottle are arguing The beer bottle says: if you break me you get one year of bad luck The mirror scoffs: oh, that's nothing, you break me and you get 7 years of bad luck. The condom overhears these arguments and walks off laughing
When your sad don’t feel down about yourself break someone’s leg and laugh.
