Body jokes
What do you get when you go to the beach and you get a tan on your feet?
Tan toes.
There is a Mexican sitting on a train.
The guy sitting next to him says, "I have a big dick."
The Mexican decides to get a lawnmower and some clippers. When he got off the train, the police found a dead body with no dick and pube hairs.
My dick is red.
Your pussy's pink.
It's really tight
When you're dead.
I have a penis.
How's that for a fucking joke? It's not a joke. It's terrible.
500 thumbs down and I'll lop off my dick with a razor.
Maybe your butt good? Maybe bad... I'M GOING TO LAUGH!
My dick's so big, I stuck it in your mom's loose hole.
Fatty and Skinny were in a bed.
Fatty rolled over, and Skinny was pegged.
Why was the fanny flat?
So it can flop about.
Have you heard of dideys?
Dideys balls fit in your mouth.
"Hey man, what’s your name? Oh, my name is... Do your balls hang low? Can you swing it to and fro? Can you tie it in a knot? Can you tie it in a bow?"
What's long, white, and thick? My dick.
You know what they say: "Location, location, location." So my dad stuck a thermometer up his butt, and now he has degrees.
Poooooooooooooooooooooop!
Your butt is so fat, I can remove 90% of beauty with a tissue.
It’s nice hitting it from the back when my wife has wide hips.
Her butt cheeks look like big huge ball sacks as my thighs smack up against them when I’m thrusting. I like to finish off by grinding my weiner up and down her back like a gay man frotting his schlong on his partner’s ding dong.
Two guys are on a plane. One of the guys' name is Jack. The other is Peter.
Peter: "Hi Jack."
Flight Attendant: "You're going to hijack the plane?!?"
Jack: "No, my name is Ja-"
Flight Attendant: "Everybody stay calm! These two men are going to hijack the plane!"
Jack: "No, no. My name is Jack and my friend here is an idiot."
My dick is hard, what's your name?
Avocado. Avocado deez nuts!
Me: Doctor, can I get a new butt? My old one has a crack in it.
Doctor: I told you a billion times already. Everyone's butt has a crack in it.
Me: How do you know that?
Your hairline is so bent, not even NASA can find it.