I need a new butt this one has a hole in it
Your forehead's so big that Michael Jackson could moonwalk across that b*tch.
Call me Willma, will my balls fit ya mouth?
What's green and smells like pork? Kermit's finger.
What's the difference between a dick and a rock?
One's hard.
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all right now.
Little Johnny's mom is taking a shower. Little Johnny walks in and asks, "What is that in between your legs?" Mommy says, "That is my keyhole." The next day, Little Johnny sees his dad taking a shower and Little Johnny asks, "What is that in between your legs?" Daddy says, "That is my key." The next day Little Johnny says to his dad, "Looks like the neighbor has the key to Mommy's keyhole too."
When I was young, I decided to go to a medical school.
At the entrance exam, we were asked to re-arrange letters
'PNEIS'
and form the name of an important human body part which is most useful when erect.
Those who answered 'SPINE' are doctors.
Why did the dog want a kiss? Because he can see his knees.
What do five dicks sticking out of glory holes and five udders both have in common? They are ready for milking.
Armless child: Can you give me a hand??
Me: Ok.
A penis has a bad life his neighbor is asshole and his friend is pussy and his owner beats him
Husband: "I think I might take a picture of your breasts and frame it."
Wife: "I think I'll take a picture of your penis and enlarge it."
What body part takes the longest to decay? The eyeball, because it will always dilate.
Two kids are out in the cold, with downpours of snow erupting from the clouds. One of the kids says something. Can we build a snowman that is going through puberty? The other kid says something else. Yes. It sounds cool. After a while, the snowman was finished, and some words jut out of the first kid's mouth: Wow! Look at that snowman! It's got hair all over. But I think it's missing something though. The other kid jumps a little and begins speaking. Oh, I know what it is! After a while, a body part made of a carrot and two cucumbers appears on the snowman's crotch. It is a penis and a ballsack. The first kid speaks. Icy what you did there. The other kid replies. Good thing I didn't slip up there. The first kid replies. Well, that's snow problem. The other kid then uttered this: These puns would make the most frigid individual crack-up. The first kid then says: I know, right? They then begin a snowball fight. The other kid then says: Only the men have snowballs!
What did the wire say to the electrician?
"Stop twisting my nuts!"
What's a bulls favorite body part? an Eye-BULL!!
Arms.
My pee pee fell off.
What is the last thing that goes through a fly's head when it hits the windshield?
Its butt.
