Bird jokes
[God creating the parrot] OK, HOW ABOUT A TYE-DYE CHICKEN THAT SCREAMS ACTUAL WORDS AT YOU?
What's the difference between a chicken and me? None, they both don't watch right and left before crossing the road.
What do you call a bird with no wings?
Answer: A FLAP.
What's the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?
A rooster clucks defiance!
The bird was trying to cross the road because there was a church, but instead, the birds chirp chirp chirp, "Let's go to church!"
Memes
What do you give a sick bird?
Tweet-ment!
How do you f**k a duck?
Usually duck a f**k.
What do you call an animal flouting?
Super bird!
I felt bad for a dog, and I looked to my left, and there was an orphan, and I said I will make you a website, and I said there won't be a homepage.
My sister's boyfriend was coming around for Christmas Day. He had the option of two birds to tuck into: Turkey or Goose.
I said, "Are you not satisfied with my sister, who is literally handing herself on a plate to you?!"
You're so fat that people say you're the biggest bird!
What's a rapper's favorite type of pet?
A rhyming parrot.
U mess with goose, he strain out all of your body juice.
U mess with goose, he hang u with noose.
Who’s better, Bird or Magic?
We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class.
I started playing the Angry Birds theme song. That didn't fly well with people, the teacher yelled at me like a bomb, and I landed on the ground.
What did the eagle say to Obama?
He said: "Joe Mama!"
What do birds use to check their grades?
Air-ies...
Why did the crows form a charity?
Because it's all for good caws!
Why did the turkey cross the road?
Answer:
To prove it wasn't chicken!
Why did the chicken cross the road?