Bird jokes
Is it a bird? Is it a plane?
I don't know, but it's coming for the towers.
What did the eagle say to Obama?
He said: "Joe Mama!"
U mess with goose, he strain out all of your body juice.
U mess with goose, he hang u with noose.
Hey, pass me that crowbar, please.
Sure... y’know, before the crowbar was invented, crows had to drink at home.
Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because they can't.
There's a new bird disease, it's called churpies.
It's a canariel disease, untweetable.
Who’s better, Bird or Magic?
We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class.
I started playing the Angry Birds theme song. That didn't fly well with people, the teacher yelled at me like a bomb, and I landed on the ground.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
Answer:
To prove it wasn't chicken!
Why did the crows form a charity?
Because it's all for good caws!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
My pet parrot had an accident and lost both his wings... he is being very brave about it though... he is totally unflappable.
What do birds use to check their grades?
Air-ies...
What do you call it when two gay roosters fight?
Cockfighting
What weighs 5 oz. and is very dangerous?
A sparrow with a machine gun, of course!
What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?
Cliff.
What do emos and a bird nest have in common?
They both hang from a tree.
Why did the emu cross the road? Because it was the chicken's day off. Yeah, I hate myself, man.
Why did the bird lay an egg on Stephen Hawkings?
Because he is Stephen HAWKings.
I have a big cock.