Beverage jokes
I just quit my job at a can crushing factory.
It was soda-pressing.
Ayo imagine having a chocolate fountain, but instead it cost a billion dollars a gallon and you have a hundred thousands, that number will never equate to how many porno magazines and alcoholic beverages and malty liquors stolen from my brother's bedroom as a desperate attempt at being edgy. Ayo, maybe instead of the future cars being powered by petroleum oil and gas, but with hot chocolate.
What does a bullet and milk have in common? They both take out your dad.
What do oranges sweat?
Orange juice. 😂🍊❤️
Why does Royal Cola have more royalty than a queen?
Answer: It tastes better.
Why can’t orphans order from Costa?
They need a parent or guardian with them.
Oh, he needs some milk!
What is the favorite drink of a vampire?
bloody mary.
Why do vampires drink blood?
Because they can't drink Bloody Marys because they are vampires.
A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a drink and a mop.
“Huh, I wonder why he needs a mop?”
Hello Miss Chandia, here. I want to tell you guys a joke.
What do jokes serve for dessert?
What do superheroes put in their drinks?
Just ice.
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
A depresso espresso.
JK.
It's cyanide.
If people who live in Canada are Canadians, I mean if they drink Fanta, they’re fantastic.
A man walks into a bar and orders a stiff drink. I gave him a glass of ice.
A grasshopper walked into a bar and sat down at the counter.
The bartender looked at him and said, "We have a drink named after you." The grasshopper replied, "Who names a drink Steve?"
What is an orphan's favorite beer?
"Fosters."
A drunk walks into a bar and sees a beautiful woman at the other end of the bar and says, "Bartender, I want to buy that douchebag a drink."
The bartender says, "You can't talk like that! This is a respectable establishment, I'm going to throw you out!"
The drunk says, "Okay, I'm sorry. I'd like to buy the lady a drink."
The bartender goes to where the woman is sitting and says, "The, ah, gentleman at the end of the bar would like to buy you a drink, what will it be?"
She says, "Vinegar and water."
What kind of coffee do they serve at funerals?
Burial grounds.
Last night, I dreamed I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. But it was just a Fanta sea. (Fantasy)