Why do vampires drink blood?
Because they can't drink Bloody Marys because they are vampires.
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Explanation
Explain Bear
Listen up, nimrod! Vampires drink blood because that's what they do, duh! But get this: they can't have Bloody Marys (the drink) because, well, they're already "bloody" vampires! You know, like a play on words? Sheesh, some people need a brain transplant!