Best jokes
Why is the wheel the best invention?
Because it's wheely wheely great!
A cock really has a sad life. He's hairs a mess, his neighbor's an arsehole, his best friend is a cunt.
What's the best song to sing to George Floyd?
"I Will Survive," by Gloria Gaynor.
Setting: Funeral Home
Customer: Yes, I was considering what would be the best option for cheap cremation, but I feel that's silly to ask.
Funeral Director: Oh! We do have these nice urns over here at a discounted 75 percent off.
Customer: Okay? What's the catch? That's almost 300 dollars off?
Funeral Director: I assure you these are top-of-the-line urns and will keep your loved ones' remains secure and dry.
Customer: Okay?
Funeral Director: Yep, these have only been used once, so it is absolutely worth the purchase.
By: MiniMemorials.com
Best friend: Let’s get tattoos of our parents.
Orphan: I don’t have parents.
What is the best type of snake? A dead one.
What’s the best part of stage four cancer?
A: There’s no stage five.
Yo Mama is so dumb, she works best when she is unemployed.
The best part of you ran down your mother's leg... Einstein got ready to climax while doing math but realized you can't cumtilyain cumtilion. It's after sucktillion fucktillion.
What’s the best air to breathe if you want to be rich? Millionaire.
What thing can an orphan do best?
Stay at home alone.
What kind of man would be a lesbian's best friend? A decimen.
I can never get away from my dog, he follows me everywhere. I think you two would be really good friends.
What did the potato say when the sweet potato told it to hurry?
I yam.
What's the best part of a terrorist on Fourth of July?
The finale.
Tell world's best yo mama joke to an orphan, then watch them cry.
The highest praise my wife gave to me was when she told me, "The best feminine attribute on your body as a woman would be your p🍆nis." 🥰
My grandpa was in 9/11. He was the best pilot.
"Grandma, tell me a story!" I said as we huddled near the campfire.
"Alright," she said, "Once, there was a tree named Timmy, he was my best tree friend. I used to read books under him and climb all his branches."
"Where is Timmy now?" I asked.
Grandma pointed to the campfire.
My crush's best friend came up to me and called me my crush's dog 🐕, so then I say, "Wow, you're an ass for calling me a bitch." He then looks at me wide-eyed, and I just walk away.