Being jokes
Being a police officer in Nunavut must be so fun. They get to play Cut the Rope on the job all the time!
I got a PS5 for my nine-year-old sister. At the time, I thought it was the best trade I’d ever made. But now I’m regretting not being able to molest her anymore.
Imagine being emo.
Couldn't be me.
What's the worst thing to happen to a Japanese person in WW2... being drafted as a kamikaze pilot, or existing with a Fat Man or Little Boy?
Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid.
Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime. Little Johnny always takes the nickel.
One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, “Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Don’t you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel’s bigger?”
Johnny grins and says, “Well, if I took the dime, they’d stop doing it, and so far I’ve made $20!”
Guys, help! I need advice to confess to my crush. I'm being for real right now, guys, help!
"{[(Log date) 11 22 3] The Beginning} "This marks the first ever log of the Underground Fruit Association of n&c (ugfa). N, being code name for Nathaniel, and C, being code name for Connor. Our plan is to collect as many fruit cups as possible by the end of the year. This site will be a communication hub only and used for nothing else. We will plan and discuss courses of action, and collection." End of log"
What’s the hardest thing about being a rapist? Fitting in.
How do you stop a MeToo feminazi from telling the world about being raped? Easy: just rape her mouth shut.
Has anybody else noticed that out of nowhere there are always tons of people online? It's kinda trippy if I'm being honest.
Life lesson guys:
Remember, being healthy is basically dying as slowly as possible.
I hate double standards. Burn a body at a crematorium, you're "being a respectful friend." Do it at home and you're "destroying evidence." Anybody relate?
So many things are going through my head.
How am I not dead yet?
People trying to stop me from being depressed: “Just cheer up!”
Me: “WOW, I NEVER THOUGHT OF THAT!”
This is not a joke, Tom. I'm asking you to leave me alone, stop being sexual, I don't like you.
What's the Pixar movie close to being a pornstar? Toy Story... *I got a friend in me*
[being buried alive]
Murderer: *out of breath* How are you eating the dirt so quickly?
Guys, don’t suck your own dick, it does not feel like your dick is being sucked, it feels like you're sucking a dick.
If mom saw you, she would die and be happy because of you being ugly.
This isn’t a joke. Quiet kid jokes are so cliché. Like since when was there an original quiet kid joke like smh. Doesn’t help because I’m a quiet kid and people act as if I’m so dangerous and it’s like the only thing they say to me. Being judged as some big bad monster for being AN INTROVERT!! These jokes used to be funny to me, but now I’m just sick of them...