Behavior jokes
What's your mom and a dog got in common?
Both will lick dick if you put peanut butter on it.
Why are gay guys so rude?
Because they’re fucking assholes.
You wanna hear a joke?
Two Emos hanging out under a tree.
How many Emos does it take to commit suicide? Way too fucking many, because they never get it right the first time!
My daughter is super smart! She pours her own drinks on the floor.
They say we have a primal sense, that we can just feel when someone is watching us.
It’s been a few weeks, and it's clear that you do not have that sense.
When a hedgehog finds poop, they put it in their mouths. They mix it with saliva until it's a foam, then rub it on themselves.
I bet emo girls get jealous when people cut paper.
Bully: My mom says I'm not allowed to burn trash.
Me: (quiet)
Bully: HEY I'M TALKING TO YOU.
Me: Are you talking to yourself? Because I was listening to music until I heard you.
Ask someone if they are a rhino. If they say yes, tell them "so you're horny." And if they reply yes again, block them from your life entirely.
Why do horses eat with their mouth open?
Because they have bad stable manners.
Why did the cheetah get in trouble at school?
Because he cheated on a test.
What do you call a very rude bird? A mockingbird.
My mates threw nuts at the wall, now we call them walnuts.
Hahaha :)
Our teacher said for two kids to stare at a wall for no reason, so I said, "Hey wall, that ass flat like a pancake from McDonald's."
Your mama is so stupid, Patrick Starr ran away because he thought she might be contagious.
Why do orphans cause trouble at school?
So the teachers will call their parents.
What's the difference between a UKIP voter and a shopping trolley?
Some shopping trolleys have minds of their own.
Is it just me, or do these gays need to leave me alone?
If you're feeling mad, punch an autistic kid. What's he gonna do, blabber to the teacher?
Why did the kidnapper cross the road?
To get the kids at the playground.